Driving pet peeves #1

This is the first installment of a series I will be posting on driving pet peeves.  Haven driven all over the US in most of the 50 States, I firmly believe we have the WORST overall drivers right here in sleepy little Colorado Springs.  The. Absolute.  WORST.  Barring third-world and emerging countries, it is my opinion that the sheer idiocy and inconsiderate-ness (is that even a word?) level here is higher than just about any other city, in any other state. �

The real problem is that, for some reason, the idiots here don’t show up statistically on a national level, so, of course, everyone here thinks they are an above-average driver.  Now, I realize that this is probably true for everyone in the world, but, let’s face it, it’s only true for 10% of the people who think it.
So, without further ado, I present pet peeve series #1:
People who drive their SUV’s like sports cars.
Got news for ya, pal.  That thing is so massive it’s got its own gravitational field.  See those things floating around your door handles?  Yeah, those are Hondas, and if you look reeeeeley close, you’ll see tiny little skeletons with little skulls frozen in a rictus of horror after being caught in orbit around your planetary bulk.
As a result, it does NOT accelerate, turn or stop like your old Camaro that you drove in high school.  So when you are screeching around a corner at mach 1 sucking down dead dinosaurs like a small country, please realize that it’s just not designed for it, and you are endagering the lives of everyone around you, and flinging Hondas all over the place as they break away from your little solar system.  Oh, and that parking spot at the Wal-Mart marked compact?  YOU DON’T FIT ,YOU ASS. So stop trying.
Peace, Love and all that–

Post Author: Kyodai

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